just cuz we are friends.

When I was in college I met a girl who I wanted to be friends with. She was fun and had sparkles on her tennis shoes. We hung out at the new student retreat and were excited when we found out we shared a class. We sat by each other and passed notes and smiled our way through the first few weeks. One day early on she brought me a mango smoothie. No real reason, she just did. And I knew we were friends.

One day last summer I was talking to a girl I knew and someone came up and told her that her brother was here. That is how I met him. I was worried about his influence on his sister because he likes hard drugs a lot. He liked to dress all tough with a black leather jacket and brag about his habits. Today he called me. He is in the hospital. He wanted me to know he is ok. We got to talk for a while and laugh. I told him I would pray for him and asked what I could bring him aside from cigarettes (which I had already refused). He laughed. I am going to see him tomorrow and bring him a chocolate bar. No real reason, just cuz we are friends.

Contemplation: paintbrush

As God paints the canvas of the universe I focus on single bristles of the brush. Here is my bad day as a bristle, or here is the very essence of God's light as another bristle. Just bristle after bristle floating over a canvas that is forgotten with each breath.
However, as followers of Christ we are called to firmly plant our lives and worship in the brush of God, not the bristles. The bristles should only point us to the brush, and an understanding of the brush should be rooted in a trust of brushstrokes. These brushstrokes over a grand canvas become portraits of God's creative heart.
______
Ushered forward by the Holy Spirit, the divine masterpiece that you have been a part of hangs on the wall in front of you: your jaw drops to the floor and the electric pulse of creation jolts up your spine.
The canvas before you is so whole, so large, so complicated that you begin to understand the need for eternity. This is no afternoon visit to the art museum. Look up. The masterpiece covers the ceiling. Walking the streets, oily rain water on sidewalk becomes the canvas. Among the change at the bottom of a beggar's cup, you see the canvas.
This masterpiece, shining with brilliant color and composure, is showing up everywhere now. On your knees you reach out and touch the surface of the canvas. Only by the lightest running of your fingers over the paint can you feel the remnants of smoothly blended brushstrokes. There are no traces of the brush bristles now, just brushstrokes, masterpiece, and eternity to take it all in.

Friends & Ice Cream

A couple Saturdays ago, my teammate Luke and I were walking through Golden Gate Park. Like usual, prayerfully asking God to guide our steps and enable us to connect with people and communicate his love. We came upon a big pile of street kids sitting on the hill in the sun, warming off the chill from the previous night. As Luke talked with some guys, I sat down next to ..., a 19 year old girl our whole team has been getting to know over the last month and a half. She sat on her skateboard, resourcefully patching the holes in her pants with scraps of fabric and dental floss for thread. We chatted as she sewed. When she finished patching a hole, there was a small piece of fabric left with no hole to cover. Most people would throw it away, but even the smallest scrap of fabric is useful when you where the same pair of pants every day. She gave the little one square inch piece of fuzzy leopard print fabric to me to sew on to my pants...a seemingly small gift, but very meaningful to me. I'm currently eyeing the holes in my jeans, determining which one is worthy to be adorned with her patch.

She had gone out for ice cream the night before with Luke & Courtney. She had had a rough evening and needed to talk so they treated her to ben & jerry's, talking over cookie dough about the many struggles of her life. I asked her if she had a good time etc. A few minutes later in the conversation, after thinking quietly for a few seconds, she looked at me and said, "You didn't get to go to ice cream last night and you really like ice cream. I have money today and as soon as I finish sewing these patches on, I want to take you out for ice cream." My empty pockets seemed to burn as I realized I had no money with me to pitch in, but I said okay. It was really precious to watch over the next hour or so her hospitality in hosting me and Luke for ice cream. It's better to give than to receive....and sometimes it's better to give someone the chance to give, that they might experience it's joy. I was blessed to see this girl, who has no earthly reason to trust or like anyone, treat us with much kindness. She asked if we would be okay with McDonald's because it wasn't very expensive. We said that was great. We told her to get one hot fudge sundae that all three of us could split. She bought two...and made sure we were enjoying it before she partook herself. When she spilled a few peanuts from the package and noticed the birds liked them...she poured a bunch out for the birds, because they should have some too. She made every effort to make sure that we were enjoying our ice cream, like any good hostess at a dinner party, even cleaning off the trash at our table as we sat. Jesus said when we do something unto the least of these, we've done it unto him....and I wonder, when the least of these does something for us, is Jesus giving us a gift? Oftentimes I come expecting to give, and God asks me to be ready to receive.

She has an incredibly sweet disposition after living through the hardships that she has. She has made many bad choices. But the choices she had to choose between and the choices I had to choose between were worlds apart. I am glad to serve a God who is sovereign and just, but who is near to the brokenhearted and whose heart is saddened by the profound pain in our world. It's not okay that she had the childhood she did and that the foster care system wasn't much of a help. As a girl so affected by her surroundings, it not okay that her surroundings have consistently been life-stealing rather life giving. The thief did indeed come to steal, kill and destroy and it is painful to see his theft, murder and destruction at work. But I rejoice that there is one who came that we might have abundant life, and that she might have abundant life. Please pray for her, that the longings within her she seeks to fill with boys, drugs, and the adventure of the open road...would be found fulfilled in the deep deep love of Christ. Grace that is far deeper than the depth of human sin and need. I long for she to hear the Father tell her that she is his daughter, that he has adopted her into his family and clothed her with robes of salvation and given her a new name. Pray that she would respond to God's pursuit of her and that the other things she pursues would be found lacking.

like Abram, like Lot

This week in Second Helping we studied chapter 14 of Genesis, when Abram rescues Lot and then meets the great Melchizedek.

We talked about how most of us identify more with Lot than with Abram's great faith; always making wrong choices and needing to be rescued over and over again. Unfortunately, we know that Lot will return to Sodom, and will need to be rescued again--seems that he just doesn't get it. But God is merciful, using his uncle Abram to rescue him time and again.

Paul writes in Ephesians 2 "And you were dead...But God, being rich in mercy...even when we were dead...made us alive together with Christ...by grace you have been saved"

God is a rescuer, a deliverer, a saver. Let us never forget that, even while we strive to be like Abram in faith, that we are still rescued like Lot, and that it is only God's mercy.